Meaty Bites Diet

 


I've got 2 dogs.  I bought a large bag of Meaty Bites at Big W and was standing in line at the check-out.

A woman behind me asked if I had a dog.



On impulse, I told her that no, I was starting The Meaty Bites Diet again,  although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 25 kgs before I woke in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and
IV's in both arms.
 

       
I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Meaty Bites and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry & that the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again.

 

                                   

I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story, particularly a guy who was behind her.

Horrified, she asked if I'd ended up in the hospital in that condition because I had been poisoned by the food.  I told her no, it was because I'd been sitting in the middle of the road licking my dick and a car hit me.



I thought one guy was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard as he staggered out the door.
 


Stupid bitch...why else would I buy dog food??

 

 

 

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